Sunday, February 22, 2009
A huge can of Crisco in my bathroom!
Apparently Crisco comes in smaller quantities, though my stupid grocery store only had the gigantic 3 lb can. This is the same stupid grocery store that has been out of frozen spinach for more than a month, so I should have known there wouldn't be much selection. In fact, this grocery store makes me so angry I'd like to kick it in the crotch, (if it had a crotch) and not only for it's lack of spinach and big-ass cans of Crisco..
So what was my attraction to try Crisco as a moisturizer? Well, most moisturizing products meant for the skin can contain stuff like parabens, propylene glycol, and a bunch of other ingredients I'm a little wary of slathering on my body after every shower I'll take for the rest of my life. I was very excited to try Crisco's scent-free simple formula of soybean and cottonseed oils, and of course the price is nice. I had also heard the rumour that Crisco is used as skincare in hospitals. A friend of mine confirmed that this is actually true, and if they use it at the hospital, it must be great (just like the food, ha ha) right?
So, the first time I tried Crisco was straight out of the shower, applying while my skin was still a little damp to 'seal in the moisture' just like we've all been instructed to do by every magazine ever. My first impression: this is pretty greasy stuff. I didn't dare try it on my face. It took some time to massage into my skin, all the while I avoided the temptation to glance at myself in the bathroom mirror, strike a pose, and say 'hey there, Crisco tits'... At first, I thought my skin felt fairly hydrated, but a couple of hours later it felt tight and needed more moisturizing. You know the feeling you get after you've used a dry oil type of product? Subsequent applications left my skin feeling the same, oily but not very moisturized, unfortunately. Most hydrating creams, lotions, etc., are oil and water emulsions. The oil traps the water on the skin. Crisco contains no water. Also, the hydrogenation process makes the oils solid, so at first I had the impression I was putting something thicker on my body. It was time-consuming to have to re-apply it several times throughout the day just so I wouldn't feel so itchy.
While I won't be using this as a moisturizer, I still think it could be useful. Crisco would be great for shining up your legs in the summer, and because it has no fragrance it won't compete with your perfume. You could even mix a little shimmer powder in with it. Mix in a few drops of essential oil, and Crisco's texture makes it perfect for massage. Now there's an idea for their next ad campaign.
My verdict: Crisco is better for pies, not thighs.
UPDATE: My daughter has since broken my pretty soap dispenser in the picture :(